When it comes to sexual behaviors, what is considered "problematic" can vary widely from person to person. This is because sexuality is deeply personal and tied to individual values, experiences, and relational dynamics. So, what exactly defines Problematic Sexual Behaviors (PSB)?
In Facing Hope (Knowlton, 2023), PSB is defined as any sexual or romantic behavior that causes issues for the individual and those connected to them. The book states:
“Healthy sexual behaviors are behaviors that align with your moral values, the commitments you’ve made to yourself or others, don’t hurt you or others emotionally or psychologically, don’t put your life or someone else’s life at risk, and don’t violate others. Sexual behaviors become problematic when they don’t align with your moral values, break commitments, hurt you or others emotionally or psychologically, put your life or someone else’s life at risk, or violate others.”
This perspective moves away from labeling behaviors as “pathological” and instead focuses on the impact they have on the individual and their relationships. It echoes Bill Herring’s (2017) framework for PSB, which prioritizes understanding how behaviors affect people rather than categorizing them based solely on societal norms.
A key takeaway is that Problematic Sexual Behaviors aren’t always about addiction or compulsion. Rather, they are defined by the harm they cause and how they clash with personal or relational commitments. For example, a person in a committed relationship may find that an extramarital affair violates the trust they've established, even if the affair doesn’t fit into a traditional definition of infidelity.
Because PSB affects both the individual and those around them, it’s essential to approach the subject with care and consideration. Whether through therapy or open communication, addressing the root causes of these behaviors can help foster healthier relationships and a deeper sense of personal integrity.
Stay tuned for more insights into PSB and how it intersects with concepts like infidelity and compulsive behaviors in our next post.
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